Our mission: to love ourselves, every last inch! To support others, help build positive self esteem! This is The Body Peace Revolution!

This is a place of encouragement, a place to talk about body image, a place for feeling beautiful. No matter what you look like, what color, what gender, what size or however many "flaws", healthy, not healthy, working on it, we are all human, we all deserve to be happy, we all deserve to love ourselves. With this blog you will see all kinds of REAL bodies, REAL people, REAL stories.

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Avoiding guilt during the holidays!

Hey all! I wrote a blog post last year around the holidays just as a reminder. I know the holidays can be a struggle for those with disordered eating or negative body image, and I wanted to give a little advice to hopefully make it easier for those who struggle with family members, food, and awkward questions.

You deserve to have an AMAZING holiday season, and I hope these pointers help!

Love,

Amber

1. Saying Things Like, “She Would Be So Pretty If…” Have you ever uttered anything along the lines of, “But she has such a gorgeous face” or “She would be more beautiful if she put on a few pounds?” You are limiting your idea of beauty to a cultural stereotype. Beauty is not conditional. If you can’t say anything nice, maybe it’s time to learn how.
2. Judging Other People’s Clothes While it’s fine for you to choose clothes any way you want, nobody else is required to adhere to your style.The person wearing that outfit is, in fact, pulling it off, even if you think she’s too flat chested, big chested, short, tall, fat or thin. And fat people don’t have to confine themselves to dark colors and vertical stripes, no matter who prefers it. And spandex? It’s a right, not a privilege.
3. Making It an ‘Us vs. Them’ Thing The phrase “Real Women Have Curves” is highly problematic. Developed as a response to the tremendous body shaming that fat women face, it still amounts to doing the same thing in the opposite direction. The road to high self-esteem is probably not paved with hypocrisy. Equally problematic is the phrase “boyish figure” as if a lack of curves makes us somehow less womanly. The idea that there is only so much beauty, only so much self-esteem to go around is a lie. Real women come in all shapes and sizes, no curves required.
4. Avoiding the Word “Fat”Dancing around the word fat is an insinuation that it’s so horrible that it can’t even be said. The only thing worse than calling fat people “big boned” or “fluffy” is using euphemisms that suggest body size indicates the state of our health or whether we take care of ourselves. As part of a resolution to end body shaming, try nixing phrases like “she looks healthy,” or “she looks like she is taking care of herself,” and “she looks like she is starving” when what you actually mean is a woman is thin.
5. Making Up Body Parts We could all lead very full lives if we never heard the words cankles, muffin top, apple shaped, pear shaped or apple butt ever again. We are not food.
6. Congratulating People for Losing Weight You don’t know a person’s circumstances. Maybe she lost weight because of an illness. You also don’t know if she’ll gain the weight back (about 95 percent of people do), in which case earlier praise might feel like criticism. If someone points out that a person has lost weight, consider adding something like, “You’ve always been beautiful. I’m happy if you are happy.” But if a person doesn’t mention her weight loss, then you shouldn’t mention it either. Think of something else you can compliment.
7. Using Pretend Compliments “You’re really brave to wear that.” By the way, wearing a sleeveless top or bikini does not take bravery. “You’re not fat, you’re beautiful.” These things are not mutually exclusive — a person can be fat and beautiful. “You can afford to eat that, you’re thin.” You don’t know if someone has an eating disorder or something else; there is no need to comment on someone’s body or food intake. “You’re not that fat” or “You’re not fat, you workout,” need to be struck from your vocabulary. Suggesting that looking fat is a bad thing is also insulting, so also out the door are, “Does this make me look fat?” and “I look so fat!” when you are a size 2.
8. Thinking of Women as Baby-Making Machines One of my readers mentioned that her gynecologist called her “good breeding stock.” Also awful: “baby making hips.” Worst of all is when people ask fat people when they are due. As has famously been said, unless you can see the baby crowning, do not assume that someone is pregnant.

9. Sticking Your Nose in Other People’s Exercise Routines A subtle form of body shaming occurs when people make assumptions or suggestions about someone’s exercise habits based on their size. Don’t ask a fat person, “Have you tried walking?” Don’t tell a thin person, “You must spend all day in the gym.” I have had people at the gym congratulate me for starting a workout program when, in fact, I started working out at age 12 and never stopped. I had a thin friend who started a weight-lifting program and someone said to her, “Be careful, you don’t want to bulk up.” How about not completely over-stepping your boundaries and being rude and inappropriate?

10. Playing Dietitian If you have no idea how much a person eats or exercises, you shouldn’t tell her to eat less and move more or suggest she put more meat on her bones. (Even if you do know what she eats, don’t do it). How do you know she’s looking for nutritional advice from you or the newest weight-loss tip you saw on Dr. Oz?
(taken from http://www.ivillage.com/guilty-15-ways-we-body-shame-without-knowing)


1. Saying Things Like, “She Would Be So Pretty If…” 

Have you ever uttered anything along the lines of, “But she has such a gorgeous face” or “She would be more beautiful if she put on a few pounds?” You are limiting your idea of beauty to a cultural stereotype. Beauty is not conditional. If you can’t say anything nice, maybe it’s time to learn how.

2. Judging Other People’s Clothes 
While it’s fine for you to choose clothes any way you want, nobody else is required to adhere to your style.The person wearing that outfit is, in fact, pulling it off, even if you think she’s too flat chested, big chested, short, tall, fat or thin. And fat people don’t have to confine themselves to dark colors and vertical stripes, no matter who prefers it. And spandex? It’s a right, not a privilege.

3. Making It an ‘Us vs. Them’ Thing 
The phrase “Real Women Have Curves” is highly problematic. Developed as a response to the tremendous body shaming that fat women face, it still amounts to doing the same thing in the opposite direction. The road to high self-esteem is probably not paved with hypocrisy. Equally problematic is the phrase “boyish figure” as if a lack of curves makes us somehow less womanly. The idea that there is only so much beauty, only so much self-esteem to go around is a lie. Real women come in all shapes and sizes, no curves required.

4. Avoiding the Word “Fat”
Dancing around the word fat is an insinuation that it’s so horrible that it can’t even be said. The only thing worse than calling fat people “big boned” or “fluffy” is using euphemisms that suggest body size indicates the state of our health or whether we take care of ourselves. As part of a resolution to end body shaming, try nixing phrases like “she looks healthy,” or “she looks like she is taking care of herself,” and “she looks like she is starving” when what you actually mean is a woman is thin.

5. Making Up Body Parts 
We could all lead very full lives if we never heard the words cankles, muffin top, apple shaped, pear shaped or apple butt ever again. We are not food.

6. Congratulating People for Losing Weight 
You don’t know a person’s circumstances. Maybe she lost weight because of an illness. You also don’t know if she’ll gain the weight back (about 95 percent of people do), in which case earlier praise might feel like criticism. If someone points out that a person has lost weight, consider adding something like, “You’ve always been beautiful. I’m happy if you are happy.” But if a person doesn’t mention her weight loss, then you shouldn’t mention it either. Think of something else you can compliment.

7. Using Pretend Compliments 
“You’re really brave to wear that.” By the way, wearing a sleeveless top or bikini does not take bravery. “You’re not fat, you’re beautiful.” These things are not mutually exclusive — a person can be fat and beautiful. “You can afford to eat that, you’re thin.” You don’t know if someone has an eating disorder or something else; there is no need to comment on someone’s body or food intake. “You’re not that fat” or “You’re not fat, you workout,” need to be struck from your vocabulary. Suggesting that looking fat is a bad thing is also insulting, so also out the door are, “Does this make me look fat?” and “I look so fat!” when you are a size 2.

8. Thinking of Women as Baby-Making Machines 
One of my readers mentioned that her gynecologist called her “good breeding stock.” Also awful: “baby making hips.” Worst of all is when people ask fat people when they are due. As has famously been said, unless you can see the baby crowning, do not assume that someone is pregnant.

9. Sticking Your Nose in Other People’s Exercise Routines 
A subtle form of body shaming occurs when people make assumptions or suggestions about someone’s exercise habits based on their size. Don’t ask a fat person, “Have you tried walking?” Don’t tell a thin person, “You must spend all day in the gym.” I have had people at the gym congratulate me for starting a workout program when, in fact, I started working out at age 12 and never stopped. I had a thin friend who started a weight-lifting program and someone said to her, “Be careful, you don’t want to bulk up.” How about not completely over-stepping your boundaries and being rude and inappropriate?

10. Playing Dietitian 
If you have no idea how much a person eats or exercises, you shouldn’t tell her to eat less and move more or suggest she put more meat on her bones. (Even if you do know what she eats, don’t do it). How do you know she’s looking for nutritional advice from you or the newest weight-loss tip you saw on Dr. Oz?

(taken from http://www.ivillage.com/guilty-15-ways-we-body-shame-without-knowing)

Our co-mod Stacy is a talented girl! In addition to being a kickass mod, she also runs an etsy shop where she sells jewelry, keychains, and all kinds of adorable stuff! Lately she’s been making some amazing body-positive jewelry like you see here! She can even customize with names, dates, colors, and pretty much anything else you can imagine!

Stacy is trying to finance a move to California to start a new life with her beau that will include healthcare and disability programs that she really needs. So not only would you be getting some great new jewelry, you’d also be helping out an amazing girl in need! So share this far and wide, and if you see anything you like, don’t be afraid to treat yoself! :

http://www.etsy.com/shop/ThePaperPoppyStore

http://www.etsy.com/shop/ThePaperPoppyStore

http://www.etsy.com/shop/ThePaperPoppyStore

Love,

Amber

New post on Adipose Activist: Avoiding Holiday Shame!

randomlancila:

In this post I offer some advice on avoiding talk from family members about your body, diets, and weight loss.

Hope you find it helpful! :)

Reblogging this again because I think it’s really important. You do NOT have to feel guilty about what you put in your mouth tomorrow. You do NOT have to be made to feel ashamed about your choices or your body by your family tomorrow. What you do with your body does not have to be a topic of conversation. 

Enjoy your holiday! :)

~Amber

Why Self-Hatred is a Bad Idea

onlinecounsellingcollege:

1. If you currently hate, or can’t live with, yourself there’s a very good chance that you believe a lot of lies. That is, lies that you’ve been told, and then accepted for yourself.

2. There’s only one you – and you’re truly valuable. You have special gifts and talents, and life experiences. And there’s a unique role that only you can play in life.

3. There’s always someone that you matter to. Even though, when we’re depressed, that is sometimes hard to see. You really matter to someone – and they truly care for you.

4. Even when things go wrong there is still a chance for change. There is hope for everyone – and change is possible. Keep on looking, keep on trying … and one day you will get there.

5. You were made to be loved and experience happiness. It is part of who we are – to keep living and keep dreaming. You deserve to find fulfilment – so don’t give up on yourself.   

fitforfighting:

Be proud of your body and what it can do!

I debated doing this for a while, I’ve always been embarrassed about my legs. I’ve never fit into skinny jeans and through middle school and high school I barely wore shorts in the summer. 

It took a lot of soul-searching and a lot of work to realize just how magnificent my legs are. Hundreds of miles and hours of Taekwondo later, I realize that these legs are strong. Powerful. Glorious. They’ve carried me through rough roads and smooth waters with grace and ease. 

I’m a size 13 in jeans and I wouldn’t change a thing.

What part  of your body do you love?
What do you wish you could love?
However small, your body is a miracle machine and its unbelievable.

You’re beautiful.

GPOY: “No Frills November” Edition.

supersandys-space:

I’m 20 days into NFN and this is the first I’m blogging about it. Partly because I didn’t think I’d make it this long, but mostly because I wanted to see if I could hold myself accountable for something this far outside my comfort zone without that voice in my head saying, “But Tumblr’s watching, you have to do it!”

Basically, NFN is this thing of where I’m not dolling myself up one single day this month. I’m learning to like the way my natural face and nails look. I’m learning to feel comfortable being in public in “sloppy” attire. I’m learning to like the natural wave in my hair. I am learning to forgo what looks good in lieu of living in a way that feels good.

“I don’t give a damn what men find attractive. It’s unfortunate what we find pleasing to the touch and pleasing to the eye is seldom the same.” — Fabienne, Pulp Fiction

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