Posts tagged message from SHYB

This is Stacy!

Stacy’s been a member of SHYB for a long time, and among the posts she’s submitted, she’s also provided some incredible art for SHYB as well! She’s a gorgeous individual inside and out and she has a lot to bring to the table, we’re SO happy to have her on board!

Here’s some background on Stacy in her own words!

“The world of body image struggles began very early for me; I was self-injuring at only 7 years old, and was in full blown ED mode by age 12. I spent 6 months in an eating disorder treatment hospital when I was 19, and I’ve spent the following 8 years working diligently to heal the broken bonds between my body and me. I made great progress, and have been fully recovered from Anorexia and Bulimia for more than 6 years, and I have not cut myself in almost 4.

In 2010 I was in a car accident which resulted in a variety of permanent injuries, including herniated disks, severe nerve damage, torn ligaments, trauma-induced fibromyalgia, and even more that is still undiagnosed. During the last 2 years I’ve continued to decline, and a result I now spend almost all of my time in a wheelchair. When I lost my health it felt like I lost everything; from big things like my career, my health, and my mobility, to more unmeasurable things like my wardrobe, my respect, and my confidence. It felt like I lost all the ground I had gained through my ED recovery, and I was right back to loathing my body. I became extremely depressed, and attempted suicide in January 2012. After I survived, I realized that I had to do something, and soon. I developed a “Body Peace Project” which was a very genuine effort to apologize to my body, to forgive myself, and to accept my current condition. I also began to be an advocate for others with disabilities and chronic illnesses, and that activist work was tremendously beneficial for my own mental health.”

“I feel like you don’t post up certain submissions because you don’t like them. Kind of messed up.”

This was a submission under a false email that we recently received. I feel it important to respond to it publicly.

We publish ALL posts that are submitted to us, unless they are before/after pictures, body negative, have pictures of fresh cuts, or underage nudity. I know that there’s a lot of rules on the submission page, but as long as they’re all followed, your post will absolutely be published!

In the case that we decide not to publish a post, we try our best to contact the person who submitted it to tell them why.

We have nearly 50,000 members, and sometimes posts slip through the cracks. We’ve had people swear they submitted multiple times, and yet it never shows up in our inbox. We’ve had people submit, and only the picture shows up, not the text. We’ve had all sorts of glitches happen. Tumblr isn’t perfect! But I thought it was important to put it out there that we would NEVER not publish a post because we ‘don’t like them.’ 

In other news, our deadline for mod applications was January 1, but I’ve been taking two intersession classes at school and I’ve been swamped under schoolwork. Hopefully now that they’re over, Annie and I can start going through the applications and pick a new mod!

Thanks, guys!

Love,

Amber

Remember that life is too short and too precious to waste.

Love, 

Amber

stophatingyourbody:

Hi everyone. Amber here!

I wanted to address something that I’ve seen not just on SHYB, but on Tumblr, and actually in fact, everywhere both online and off. It’s called concern trolling.

Concern trolling can take many forms, but the basic gist of it is the following:

(picture of a fat girl)
Concern troll: I’m really glad she’s happy with herself but that’s really unhealthy!
or
Concern troll: She should really be exercising and eating better! Her joints must be taking a beating!
or
Concern troll: Oh my god, she’s going to die if she doesn’t change her lifestyle! 

(picture of a very slim girl)
Concern troll: She’s beautiful but she should really eat a sandwich!
or
Concern troll: She MUST have an eating disorder!
or
Concern troll: it’s not healthy if I can see her ribs!

Basically anything that starts out with ‘I’m glad she/he is happy/proud/loves him/herself, but…’

These people can appear on any kind of post, using any variation of comments. The one thing they have in common is the guise of ‘concern’ or ‘helpfulness’ to the original poster.

It’s important for everyone reading this to realize just how unhelpful this is to everyone. Fat people know that they’re fat. Skinny people know they’re skinny. Everyone who has some kind of ‘abnormality’ (and I use that term very loosely) is perfectly aware that they have it. 

You cannot tell someone’s health by looking at them. Regardless of whether they’re 70lbs or 400lbs. What’s more important then that, however, is that the health of anyone else has absolutely nothing to do with you. For anyone to judge anyone else under the guise of concern is incredibly condescending and unkind. 

Remember the golden rule: If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

It’s important to remember that people are revealing their biggest insecurities when they submit to this blog, and it’s very difficult to be that brave and vulnerable. All we ask is that as a community, we ALL support one another to have a happy and positive outlook on life.

This is a body positive space. ALL bodies are good bodies, and EVERYONE deserves to be happy and have positive self esteem regardless of the size of their bodies, how healthy they are, or anything else that’s purely physical. If you disagree with this mindset, perhaps SHYB isn’t the blog for you.

As always, we mods can’t catch everything, so if you see someone concern trolling or making negative comments on ANY post, PLEASE tell us about it so we can remove them from the site. You can either send us an ask, or submit the link to the post so we can take care of it.

Thanks for reading, and stay beautiful!

Love,

Amber

Please remember that the people who submit here are very brave, sharing pictures and stories that are incredibly personal.

If you do not have a nice comment to make in response to a post, don’t reply at all.

I’ve been seeing more and more negative comments to posts lately, and it’s completely missing the point of this blog. 

This blog is about support and acceptance and NOT judging. Not yourself, and not other people. Even comments like ‘I’d kill for her body’ are completely counterproductive. Negative body talk does not help anyone.

Repeat offenders run the risk of being banned from the site. And as always, if you SEE someone commenting negatively, please tell us. You can submit a post with a link to the post and the username of the offending comment.

Unfortunately we mods simply can’t look at every comment made on every post. We’re counting on you to help us out to make this a safe, supportive community for EVERYONE who submits.

Thanks!

Amber

Hi everyone. Amber here!

I wanted to address something that I’ve seen not just on SHYB, but on Tumblr, and actually in fact, everywhere both online and off. It’s called concern trolling.

Concern trolling can take many forms, but the basic gist of it is the following:

(picture of a fat girl)
Concern troll: I’m really glad she’s happy with herself but that’s really unhealthy!
or
Concern troll: She should really be exercising and eating better! Her joints must be taking a beating!
or
Concern troll: Oh my god, she’s going to die if she doesn’t change her lifestyle! 

(picture of a very slim girl)
Concern troll: She’s beautiful but she should really eat a sandwich!
or
Concern troll: She MUST have an eating disorder!
or
Concern troll: it’s not healthy if I can see her ribs!

Basically anything that starts out with ‘I’m glad she/he is happy/proud/loves him/herself, but…’

These people can appear on any kind of post, using any variation of comments. The one thing they have in common is the guise of ‘concern’ or ‘helpfulness’ to the original poster.

It’s important for everyone reading this to realize just how unhelpful this is to everyone. Fat people know that they’re fat. Skinny people know they’re skinny. Everyone who has some kind of ‘abnormality’ (and I use that term very loosely) is perfectly aware that they have it. 

You cannot tell someone’s health by looking at them. Regardless of whether they’re 70lbs or 400lbs. What’s more important then that, however, is that the health of anyone else has absolutely nothing to do with you. For anyone to judge anyone else under the guise of concern is incredibly condescending and unkind. 

Remember the golden rule: If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.

It’s important to remember that people are revealing their biggest insecurities when they submit to this blog, and it’s very difficult to be that brave and vulnerable. All we ask is that as a community, we ALL support one another to have a happy and positive outlook on life.

This is a body positive space. ALL bodies are good bodies, and EVERYONE deserves to be happy and have positive self esteem regardless of the size of their bodies, how healthy they are, or anything else that’s purely physical. If you disagree with this mindset, perhaps SHYB isn’t the blog for you.

As always, we mods can’t catch everything, so if you see someone concern trolling or making negative comments on ANY post, PLEASE tell us about it so we can remove them from the site. You can either send us an ask, or submit the link to the post so we can take care of it.

Thanks for reading, and stay beautiful!

Love,

Amber

(via stophatingyourbody)

stophatingyourbody:

Here at Stop Hating Your Body we realize that the journey to self-love is a long one, and it never really ends. 2012 will be here soon, and we’re wondering! What are YOUR goals for 2012? Submit your REVOLUTIONS and tell the world your plan to better yourself and the world around you for the new year!

Here are some suggestions!

DON’T focus on the physical! Instead of doing 100 sit ups daily or trying to lose 10lbs, instead focus on your perception!

• I’ll find something I love in every body part I’m uncomfortable with.
• I’ll do things that make my body feel good, and not torture or deprive it.
• I’ll focus on my emotional well-being and try to decrease stressors in my life.
• I’ll buy some bubble bath, face-masks, and soothing music for the times I need some self-care.
• I’ll tune out negative outside influences in my life by not reading magazines, listening to diet or makeup ads, or listening to anyone who thinks they know how to make me happy better than I do.
• I’ll stand up to that nagging family member who asks when I’m going to go on a diet/get a boyfriend/dress nicer and tell them that my body and my life are MINE to make decisions about!
• I’ll stop comparing myself to other people and find the beauty within myself.

Work not just to better yourself, but to better the environment for those around you! 

• I’ll take a sister/brother/niece/other family member or friend under my wing and make sure they know that they are beautiful no matter what, and that no matter what other people say, they are the only ones who can decide their self-worth.
• I’ll try to help those around me with their body image and self-esteem issues.
• I won’t use words like ‘fat’, ‘anorexic’, ‘retarded’, or anything else in a negative manner.
• When I see someone getting bullied or made fun of, I’ll find a way to get help.
• When I see hurtful ads on TV, radio, or internet, I will find a way to tell those advertisers that the way they try to sell their products is NOT right.
• I’ll never send anon hate on Tumblr or any other social networking site!

We want to hear your New Years Resolutions (revolutions!) so submit NOW and tell us your goals and how you plan to achieve them!

BE BRAVE! JOIN THE NEW YEAR’S REVOLUTION!

(via stophatingyourbody)

stophatingyourbody:

Here at Stop Hating Your Body we realize that the journey to self-love is a long one, and it never really ends. 2012 will be here soon, and we’re wondering! What are YOUR goals for 2012? Submit your REVOLUTIONS and tell the world your plan to better yourself and the world around you for the new year!

Here are some suggestions!

DON’T focus on the physical! Instead of doing 100 sit ups daily or trying to lose 10lbs, instead focus on your perception!

• I’ll find something I love in every body part I’m uncomfortable with.
• I’ll do things that make my body feel good, and not torture or deprive it.
• I’ll focus on my emotional well-being and try to decrease stressors in my life.
• I’ll buy some bubble bath, face-masks, and soothing music for the times I need some self-care.
• I’ll tune out negative outside influences in my life by not reading magazines, listening to diet or makeup ads, or listening to anyone who thinks they know how to make me happy better than I do.
• I’ll stand up to that nagging family member who asks when I’m going to go on a diet/get a boyfriend/dress nicer and tell them that my body and my life are MINE to make decisions about!
• I’ll stop comparing myself to other people and find the beauty within myself.

Work not just to better yourself, but to better the environment for those around you! 

• I’ll take a sister/brother/niece/other family member or friend under my wing and make sure they know that they are beautiful no matter what, and that no matter what other people say, they are the only ones who can decide their self-worth.
• I’ll try to help those around me with their body image and self-esteem issues.
• I won’t use words like ‘fat’, ‘anorexic’, ‘retarded’, or anything else in a negative manner.
• When I see someone getting bullied or made fun of, I’ll find a way to get help.
• When I see hurtful ads on TV, radio, or internet, I will find a way to tell those advertisers that the way they try to sell their products is NOT right.
• I’ll never send anon hate on Tumblr or any other social networking site!

We want to hear your New Years Resolutions (revolutions!) so submit NOW and tell us your goals and how you plan to achieve them!

BE BRAVE! JOIN THE NEW YEAR’S REVOLUTION!

Here at Stop Hating Your Body we realize that the journey to self-love is a long one, and it never really ends. 2012 will be here soon, and we’re wondering! What are YOUR goals for 2012? Submit your REVOLUTIONS and tell the world your plan to better yourself and the world around you for the new year!

Here are some suggestions!

DON’T focus on the physical! Instead of doing 100 sit ups daily or trying to lose 10lbs, instead focus on your perception!

• I’ll find something I love in every body part I’m uncomfortable with.
• I’ll do things that make my body feel good, and not torture or deprive it.
• I’ll focus on my emotional well-being and try to decrease stressors in my life.
• I’ll buy some bubble bath, face-masks, and soothing music for the times I need some self-care.
• I’ll tune out negative outside influences in my life by not reading magazines, listening to diet or makeup ads, or listening to anyone who thinks they know how to make me happy better than I do.
• I’ll stand up to that nagging family member who asks when I’m going to go on a diet/get a boyfriend/dress nicer and tell them that my body and my life are MINE to make decisions about!
• I’ll stop comparing myself to other people and find the beauty within myself.

Work not just to better yourself, but to better the environment for those around you! 

• I’ll take a sister/brother/niece/other family member or friend under my wing and make sure they know that they are beautiful no matter what, and that no matter what other people say, they are the only ones who can decide their self-worth.
• I’ll try to help those around me with their body image and self-esteem issues.
• I won’t use words like ‘fat’, ‘anorexic’, ‘retarded’, or anything else in a negative manner.
• When I see someone getting bullied or made fun of, I’ll find a way to get help.
• When I see hurtful ads on TV, radio, or internet, I will find a way to tell those advertisers that the way they try to sell their products is NOT right.
• I’ll never send anon hate on Tumblr or any other social networking site!

We want to hear your New Years Resolutions (revolutions!) so submit NOW and tell us your goals and how you plan to achieve them!

BE BRAVE! JOIN THE NEW YEAR’S REVOLUTION!

Remember that golden rule? If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all? That is very important here at Stop Hating Your Body.

Please take a minute to read our rules.

Be aware that negativity will get you blocked from SHYB.

Body policing, disdain or disgust with other people’s choices, or other negative comments have NO place on a blog like this. We are here to support, inspire, and love.

Also please be aware that we mods aren’t always able to catch everything, so if you see something rude or hateful in a comment, reply, or reblog, PLEASE let us know so we can deal with it!

Thank you so much! You guys are the best!!

Amber