Posts tagged beauty
Posts tagged beauty
My semester is finished in a couple weeks which means I’ll have more free time to work on my art, and I’m curious if any of you would be interested in body positive art?
Pieces would range in price depending on size, and time spent to create and materials used, but I can be messaged directly for information about that depending on the commission.
You can see examples of my art at : aloverstale.tumblr.com/tagged/katiesart
But let me know because I’d love to create pieces that inspire others!
I hope you’re all doing well on your journeys to love yourselves! Good luck, and keep fighting!
The body positivity community online is wonderful, I notice it particularly with my time spent on tumblr, especially working with Stop Hating Your Body. However, something that I’ve noticed in this community is that there seems to be two types of body that are talked about quite a lot. The thin women and the fat women. Now, like I said before I love all of these women I’ve interacted with and I love the discussions brought forward by people online about the issues of Health At Every Size, Fatphobia, Privilege, etc. My problem, which is purely personal, is that I don’t really know where I fit in.This becomes very pronounced when I go shopping.
I am a tall girl (5’10), I also have a large ass (that I love), however I also have a small torso and tiny breasts. This makes for difficult shopping. In pants I range from a size 12-14 depending on the store I go to, which when you only have straight clothing shops in your area can prove difficult, especially since a size 12 at H&M is really a size 8. The plus sized fashion industry begins right at my size, however when I’ve gone into plus sized stores I find that their sizes truly begin at 16, which leaves hanging out to dry. I also have a hard time finding dresses or skirts because of my height, everything is so short on me, they could easily be shirts not dresses! I see pictures throughout the blogsphere of thin girls in beautiful clothing, and fat girls in beautiful clothing, but it takes a lot of hunting for me to find women who look like me and are average. I just want others to know that they’re not alone in this confusion, and if anyone has any recommendations of clothing stores, or blogs I could follow that would help please let me know :D
‘No other group in America has so had their identity socialized out of existence as have black women… When black people are talked about the focus tends to be on black men; and when women are talked about the focus tends to be on white women.’- Bell Hooks
The compilation collage of some of the images from KPF Photography photoshoot
In 2013 I resolve to love my body by not only appreciating it as it is (for it is as it is for reasons, even if I don’t know what those reasons are), and by treating it with the love it deserves.
I will drink more water and cut out sodas and other sugary drinks (though never tea; I love tea too much).
I will become involved in pole dancing classes, so that I can use my body to its utmost, and learn what new and wonderful things my body can do, and to help myself appreciate these things.
I will eat at least one fruit everyday, because fruits are good for you, and my body deserves to have things in it that are good for it.
I will make a serious attempt to do Zumba on the Wii at least once a week, to stay active, and to stay moving in a dancey way, which I love to do.
Through all of these things I hope to realize the amazing things my body can do, and nourish it appropriately, and thereby love it more fully.
Never settle as an option.
http://thoufrenemy.tumblr.com <—- Follow me!
I’m 20 days into NFN and this is the first I’m blogging about it. Partly because I didn’t think I’d make it this long, but mostly because I wanted to see if I could hold myself accountable for something this far outside my comfort zone without that voice in my head saying, “But Tumblr’s watching, you have to do it!”
Basically, NFN is this thing of where I’m not dolling myself up one single day this month. I’m learning to like the way my natural face and nails look. I’m learning to feel comfortable being in public in “sloppy” attire. I’m learning to like the natural wave in my hair. I am learning to forgo what looks good in lieu of living in a way that feels good.
“I don’t give a damn what men find attractive. It’s unfortunate what we find pleasing to the touch and pleasing to the eye is seldom the same.” — Fabienne, Pulp Fiction
I remember when I hated seeing pictures of myself. I would mentally photoshop out the scars, the fat, the stretchmarks… the imperfections. Now when I look at photos of myself I can’t stop staring because that is the same girl I would mentally abuse and beat down. I tried to kill her spirit; I’m just glad I didn’t succeed. <3
So recently I’ve been getting more into clothes. I tend to have a moment, once every few months, where I decide that I’m going to buy more clothes, look into fashion and diversify my wardrobe. This usually lasts about two days. Then I’m back to not giving a shit.
My usual outfits consist of nerdy/band t-shirts and jeans. Occasionally, if I’m feeling ambitious, I’ll wear a plaid button up and a tank top but usually I go with a t-shirt. People who are into fashion will often tell you that your clothes should reflect who you are. For me, what I like is who I am. When I wear my Sunnydale High t-shirt, or my Tegan and Sara shirt or my countless other fandom/music tees, I am telling the world what I like. I’m telling the world who I am. It’s always baffled me why fandom/band tees aren’t considered fashionable. If fashion is about showing your personality through clothes then my t-shirts say far more about me than anything you could find on a catwalk. However, I have been feeling a little bored of just t-shirts and jeans. I want some other options, something a bit different, something that’s still me but a little more unexpected. Fear not – I haven’t abandoned my t-shirts. My Battlestar Galactica replica tank top came today and it is hands down the best thing I own. I will always love my fandom tees but right now I’m looking for something new.
I suppose this is why I’ve never really realised quite how awful the fashion industry is until now. I’ve always surrounded myself in a cocoon of unisex t-shirts which pretty much always have my size, even if I have to go for a men’s size for the right fit. I’ve never really gone looking for anything else before, anything “fashionable”. I’ve always just assumed that clothes shops would be full of stuff I’d hate in unrealistically small sizes. Until now I hadn’t realised quite how true this was.
So… here I am.
Today, I shaved my head. 6 months, 1 round of Chemo, 1 round of Radiation, and 1/4 cycles into round 2 of Chemo finally robbed me of my hair. Which was, surprisingly traumatic.
I’ve never been a big hair person. I’ve threatened to shave my head for YEARS only to rebuffed by friends and family. So when we met with my Oncologist for the first time and we discussed the potential chemo, I actually sort of considered the hair loss to be a silver lining.
Before my first round of chemo, I shaved my head pro-actively. We had a big party actually. A bunch of my friends got together and we had food, and gifts, and had a celebration of defiance. It was empowering.
Of course, then I didn’t lose my hair after all. But after a month off of treatment, I’ve started Round 2 of 2 of Chemo. At the initial pre-treatment assessment we talked about the side-effects being a little bit different this time around. And while there were things she neglected to mention (like the body-wrenching bone pain), she did let me know that my hair would fall out this time, definitively. We were talking about how unhappy I was with the color and texture of the hair that grew back post-buzz cut. And she sort of chuckled and said, “Well, in a couple weeks that will be pretty much wiped clean.”
I didn’t realize how literal that would end up being. Yesterday was 2 weeks to the day from Treatment #1 and on Monday the first few strands started to come out. Tuesday, more, thicker. By Wednesday I was starting to look a bit bizarre. I started wearing scarves and hats. By the end of the day Thursday- I looked like a neglected, possessed kewpie-doll.
I had no idea how traumatic the process of losing my hair was going to be. I knew it would be hard. But I’ve never been a hair person. Never been that caught up with my appearance. I just— I didn’t think it would matter that much.
But there is something so real, so vivid, so painful about watching fistfulls of hair come away from your head. To watch a small bald spot become a large bald patch. To leave behind a trail of hair as you walk through the house. I didn’t realize. Fortunately, I have a dear friend who is also my hairdresser. And another who let us borrow her house.
Lisa buzzed out the rest of my hair, and Stacey sat and watched and distracted me. There was calming music, aromatherapy incense and lots of love. There were tears on the initial reveal, it was hard to let people see what was there. Or what wasn’t as the case may be. I didn’t even show Kris- and we live in the same house. They are the only 2 people who saw that… hair-losing-phase in person.
When I got home, I took my razor and finished the job, leaving my head smooth and soft. And surprisingly- it actually looks pretty good.
I think there are a few reasons why this has been so hard to deal with. One is that the hair loss is such an universal and obvious sign that I’m sick, that I have Cancer. It’s this sight that tells the world- This girl has Cancer. And that’s hard. My size has actually made me a little lucky in that respect. I have (up to this point) looked incredibly healthy. Strong. People tell me that all the time. And that’s helped in a way- to keep me from sort of… sinking into all of this the way I otherwise could have.
But to be fair, and to be honest, there is more to it than that. I spent 20 years hating the way I looked. Feeling Ugly, unlovable, unattractive, unwantable. And there were a lot of issues that went into that assessment- but in the last 2 years I did so much work to change all of that. Not to change my looks- but to change my FEELINGS. To finally realize that I was beautiful just the way I was. And the truth is, this whole Cancer process has put a little bit of a dent in all of that. My body is changing, constantly, sometimes drastically. I face this sort of- readjustment period every time I look in a mirror- learning my new shape, my new condition, my new look. Over and over.
And for whatever reason- seeing myself in a patchwork of hair and skin— seeing this so-obvious sign of illness, was finally, once and for all— too much. For the first time in more than 2 years, I felt ugly again.
So today, I came home from Stacey’s and finished my head shaving at home, carefully running the palm of my hand back and forth, following with the razor when I ran in to small pockets of rough hair. And less than 20 minutes later, baby smooth… soft… pale.
And you can still see a difference. Patches of darker scalp where I still had hair- follicles left behind giving shadow to my otherwise empty head. But I can handle that. So, I showered off the loose hair, showered off the trauma and meloncholy of the last few days and dressed. I chose a necklace (one of my own making of course- why miss a marketing opportunity right?), and sat in front of the computer, photoboothing until I had 4 shots that I didn’t just… not hate, but that I actually liked.
For the first time all week, I can look myself in the eye again. And here I am. Bald. But still beautiful. Not that I wasn’t still beautiful yesterday or the day before. Not that I wasn’t beautiful the whole time. I was. But I don’t necessarily think it’s the “look” of my shaved head that made things better. Like my first pre-chemo buzz… I think it was the act of making the choice. Of not waiting for Chemo, for Cancer to steal one. more. thing. from me, from my life.
Of course as a bonus- I look pretty bitching as a baldie. And Cancer hasn’t changed everything. I’m still fat. I’m still fabulous. It’s just that now, I’m not burdened with the ordeal of having to make my hair behave for a few months.
So here’s to being beautiful. Even as a psycho-possessed-kewpie-doll.
“What began as an artistic curiosity for Deborah Willis turned into a sociological discussion a decade later.
Willis is the curator of “Posing Beauty in African American Culture,” an exhibit opening today at the Figge Art Museum in Davenport.
“I’d been interested in looking at the history of beauty in African-American culture and how it has been basically ignored as a conversation in art,” Willis said from her office at New York University, where she is the chair of and a professor in the photography and imaging department.
“I decided to look at beauty from the aspect of empowering and segregation. During the civil rights movement, there was evidence of people trying to debase black people based on difference,” she continued. “So I wanted to look at beauty in a different way, look how both black and white photographers photographed the black community.”
Willis combed through the photos in the archives of museums throughout the country, including the University of Iowa.
“When I conducted the research, I was amazed at the array of images that were there but had never circulated in a collection,” she said.
She found photographs dating to the 1890s, such as a portrait called “Desert Queen” and a beauty pageant for black women.
“Not objectifying women in terms of objects, but finding a sense of self-worth in a 30-year period after slavery,” Willis said. “People were not looking at them as desirable.”
The traveling exhibit, which continues through Nov. 4, has been touring the country for four years and spawned a book of the same title.
Willis, who will appear at the Figge to discuss the exhibit Sept. 27, said that “idealized beauty” has always been viewed “through the lens of the white woman.”
“That’s the negotiating that causes the basic trouble of how they look at the body,” she said.
The response to the exhibit, she said, has been beyond what she imagined.
“I was thrilled about it, but people were amazed. They were shocked,” she said. “Some people, in terms of blacks, said, ‘I didn’t know we looked like that.’
“It was heartbreaking to hear that.” “
When the camera dies, the iPhone works as a back up.
After the photographer’s camera battery died right after changing outfits.
This weekend I hosted a party at my house for 7 young girls who were 14 heading into high school in the fall.
I did this because I went through a lot of self hatred, self harm, an bad relationship, all on top of school work and it was really, really hard. So I wanted to have a night to be real and hang out with these girls and give them some advice on how to better love themselves and have a better high school experience…
It was wonderful! They all loved it and want to do it again, and they really loved being able to talk about issues that were pressing on them and frustrated them.
But at the same time it was also sad, because every single one of these 7 girls was upset about some aspect of their bodies, their stomachs weren’t flat enough, their eyes were too far apart, they looked to young, they had ugly hair, they hated their chests… The list could go on and on, and it’s so sad that this is the case for almost every girl I know at this age.
Girls, I write this to you today to say:
You are beautiful, you are worthy of all the love you receive and you are worthy of so much more than even that!
Your stomachs are beautiful at any size, your eyes are gorgeous, your hair is wonderful, you, yes you… are AHMAYZINGGGGGGG!
Take time to work on your heart and your mind, and in time you will be able to see this on a daily basis.
You. Are. Wonderful.
I’ve decided to do this as a sort of series for SHYB, I’ll post ideas as they come to me, but as an art student and someone who always wants something fun to do I thought this would be good for you guys to decorate your rooms with, your lockers with, etc!
Let me know in my ask box if you love the idea and reblog if you plan on doing it yourself! Submit photos of your Self Love Creations as well :) <3
SO LET IT BEGIN!
Self Love Reminder Jars.
Go to your local wallmart, grocery store, even goodwill or salvation army! Pick up a mason jar (if you can only get them in packs then make these for friends too!).
Now you can leave your mason jar as is, or decorate it if you’d like, a fun way I suggest is to take Modge Podge (found in wallmart, canadian tire, lowes) and paint it on the inside of your jar and then pour your favourite colour glitter into the jar till it covers the entire thing. For a more visual description of how to do this here is a video Ingrid made doing the same thing to a candle jar
Then when you are finished this and are waiting for this to dry, rip up small pieces of paper and write positive things about yourself, be it physical, or your great qualities or write down dreams you have and you want to achieve! enough so the jar is full to the brim, and screw on the lid.
On top of the lid
Write “You Are Beautiful” or create a really cool glittered lid to go with it!
Whenever you feel down and need some lifting up, take the jar and read one of the notes or however many you need to read to make you feel better <3
Or keep it by your bed and read it every morning when you wake up, and every night before you go to bed!
Beauty is all around us, fill yourself up with something beautiful and spread it to others!
I hope you all have a really great Tuesday, and have a great time making these!